45 Unforgettable Funny Famous Last Words Throughout History
Famous last words have always held a special place in history, offering a final glimpse into the minds of notable figures. But not all last words are solemn or profound—some are downright hilarious.
In this article, we’ll explore some of the most funny famous last words ever recorded. These humorous parting remarks from historical figures, celebrities, authors, and everyday people provide a lighthearted reminder that even in our final moments, a sense of humor can shine through. Get ready to laugh and appreciate the wit of those who left us with a smile.
Funny Famous Last Words from History
Throughout history, many notable figures have left us with their memorable last words. While some are solemn and profound, others are surprisingly funny, providing a glimpse into their wit and personality even in their final moments. Here are some examples of funny famous last words from history, along with the context that makes them so memorable.
1. “My wallpaper and I are fighting a duel to the death. One or the other of us has to go.” – Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
Context: The famous playwright and poet, known for his sharp wit, was staying in a shabby Paris hotel when he uttered these humorous last words, lamenting the decor in his final moments.
2. “Don’t let it end like this. Tell them I said something.” – Pancho Villa (1878-1923)
Context: The Mexican revolutionary leader was mortally wounded when he realized he hadn’t left behind any memorable last words. His request for a more dramatic ending is both ironic and amusing.
3. “How about this for a headline for tomorrow’s paper? ‘French fries.'” – James French (1936-1966)
Context: James French was a convicted murderer who was executed in the electric chair. His pun on his last name and method of execution shows his dark sense of humor even in the face of death.
4. “Tomorrow, at sunrise, I shall no longer be here.” – Nostradamus (1503-1566)
Context: Known for his prophetic abilities, Nostradamus’s last words were both humorous and accurate. He predicted his own death with a touch of irony.
5. “I’m bored with it all.” – Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
Context: The British Prime Minister, who led the UK through World War II, expressed his weariness with life in a characteristically blunt manner, showcasing his dry humor to the very end.
6. “I am about to – or I am going to – die; either expression is correct.” – Dominique Bouhours (1628-1702)
Context: The French grammarian and Jesuit priest made a final comment on grammar as he lay dying, turning his last moment into a witty observation on language.
7. “Now, now, my good man, this is no time for making enemies.” – Voltaire (1694-1778)
Context: When asked by a priest to renounce Satan, Voltaire, the famous Enlightenment writer, philosopher, and wit, gave this clever response, reflecting his lifelong irreverence and sharp mind.
8. “They couldn’t hit an elephant at this distance.” – John Sedgwick (1813-1864)
Context: Union Army General John Sedgwick spoke these words during the American Civil War, moments before being shot by a Confederate sharpshooter. His overconfidence and the immediate irony of his death make this a darkly humorous remark.
9. “Tag, you’re it.” – Richard B. Mellon (1858-1933)
Context: The president of the Alcoa company and a prominent industrialist, Richard B. Mellon, played a lifelong game of tag with his brother Andrew. As he lay on his deathbed, he tagged his brother and left him “it.”
10. “Dying is easy, comedy is hard.” – George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)
Context: The famous playwright and critic left us with a remark that captures the essence of his career in the arts, emphasizing the difficulty of making people laugh even as he faced his own death.
Funny Famous Last Words from Celebrities
Celebrities often leave a lasting impression through their work and public personas. Some also manage to leave us with a smile through their witty and humorous last words. Here are some examples of funny famous last words from celebrities, along with the context that makes them so memorable.
1. “I’m losing it.” – Frank Sinatra (1915-1998)
Context: The legendary singer and actor uttered these simple yet poignant words as he passed away, showcasing his awareness of the end in a straightforward, almost comedic way.
2. “I’ll be in Hell before you start breakfast!” – Stan Laurel (1890-1965)
Context: The beloved comedian, known for his work as one half of Laurel and Hardy, joked with his nurse when she told him he’d be fine in the morning. His humor remained intact to the end.
3. “This is no way to live!” – Groucho Marx (1890-1977)
Context: The iconic comedian and star of the Marx Brothers films was known for his quick wit and sarcasm. Even in his final moments, he managed to deliver a line that was both funny and poignant.
4. “Codeine… bourbon…” – Tallulah Bankhead (1902-1968)
Context: The famous actress and socialite was known for her flamboyant personality and sharp wit. Her last words reflect her larger-than-life persona and unique sense of humor.
5. “I should never have switched from Scotch to Martinis.” – Humphrey Bogart (1899-1957)
Context: The legendary actor, famous for his roles in classic films like “Casablanca,” delivered this humorous reflection on his choice of drinks as his final words.
6. “I’ve had eighteen straight whiskies… I think that’s the record.” – Dylan Thomas (1914-1953)
Context: The Welsh poet and writer known for his intense lifestyle made this darkly humorous remark before slipping into a coma from which he never recovered.
7. “I am still alive!” – Caligula (12-41 AD)
Context: The infamous Roman Emperor reportedly shouted these words as he was being assassinated. His defiant and somewhat humorous declaration underscores his larger-than-life character.
8. “Don’t disturb my circles!” – Archimedes (c. 287-212 BC)
Context: The ancient Greek mathematician and inventor supposedly said this to a Roman soldier who interrupted his work. His dedication to his studies even in his final moments adds a touch of humor to his story.
9. “Am I dying or is this my birthday?” – Lady Nancy Astor (1879-1964)
Context: The first woman to serve as a Member of Parliament in the British House of Commons, Lady Astor awoke briefly to find her family gathered around her bed and made this humorous observation.
10. “Friends applaud, the comedy is finished.” – Ludwig van Beethoven (1770-1827)
Context: The renowned composer, who faced many struggles in his life, including deafness, delivered this final, somewhat ironic line that mirrored his dramatic life and career.
11. “Damn it… Don’t you dare ask God to help me.” – Joan Crawford (1905-1977)
Context: The legendary actress reportedly snapped at her housekeeper who was praying aloud as Crawford lay on her deathbed, showcasing her fiery spirit even in her final moments.
12. “I’m going away tonight.” – James Brown (1933-2006)
Context: The Godfather of Soul spoke these simple, matter-of-fact words before passing away, showing his awareness and acceptance of his final journey.
13. “I have a terrific headache.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt (1882-1945)
Context: The 32nd President of the United States uttered these understated last words before dying of a massive cerebral hemorrhage, revealing his stoic nature even in the face of sudden death.
Funny Famous Last Words from Authors and Philosophers
Authors and philosophers are known for their profound thoughts and eloquent words. Some, however, managed to leave us with a smile through their witty and humorous last words. Here are some examples of funny famous last words from authors and philosophers, along with the context that makes them so memorable.
1. “I have tried so hard to do right.” – Grover Cleveland (1837-1908)
Context: The 22nd and 24th President of the United States, known for his honesty and integrity, left behind these humble and somewhat humorous words that reflect his lifelong dedication to doing what he believed was right.
2. “Go on, get out! Last words are for fools who haven’t said enough.” – Karl Marx (1818-1883)
Context: The philosopher and revolutionary socialist dismissed the notion of last words, maintaining his critical and irreverent stance until the very end.
3. “Goodnight, my darlings, I’ll see you tomorrow.” – Noel Coward (1899-1973)
Context: The playwright, composer, and actor, known for his wit and charm, bid farewell to his friends with these affectionate and hopeful words.
4. “I am not the least afraid to die.” – Charles Darwin (1809-1882)
Context: The father of evolutionary theory, Darwin’s last words were reassuring and calm, yet there’s a touch of humor in his straightforward acceptance of death.
5. “I feel nothing, apart from a certain difficulty in continuing to exist.” – Bernard de Fontenelle (1657-1757)
Context: The French philosopher and writer, known for his wit and intelligence, summed up his final moments with characteristic irony and humor.
6. “Now why did I do that?” – General William Erskine (1770-1813)
Context: The British General reportedly uttered these words after jumping from a window, reflecting a moment of dark humor and regret.
7. “Damn, a woman who can fart is not dead.” – Victor Hugo (1802-1885)
Context: The renowned French poet and novelist Victor Hugo reportedly said this line as he lay dying, capturing his humorous and irreverent spirit even in his final moments.
8. “I have not told half of what I saw.” – Marco Polo (1254-1324)
Context: The Venetian explorer Marco Polo, known for his travels in Asia, left these intriguing last words that hint at the many adventures he had that were never recorded, blending humor and mystery.
9. “I should have drunk more champagne.” – John Maynard Keynes (1883-1946)
Context: The British economist and philosopher’s last words reflect a humorous regret over not enjoying more of life’s pleasures, a fitting end for a man who appreciated the finer things in life.
10. “That was the best ice-cream soda I ever tasted.” – Lou Costello (1906-1959)
Context: The American comedian, half of the Abbott and Costello duo, made this simple yet humorous remark about an ice-cream soda he had just enjoyed, showcasing his love for life’s simple pleasures even in his final moments.
11. “Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.” – Groucho Marx (1890-1977)
Context: The comedian and actor Groucho Marx, known for his quick wit and humor, reportedly made this quip, perfectly encapsulating his lifelong comedic style even as he faced death.
Funny Famous Last Words from Everyday People
Not only famous figures and celebrities leave behind humorous last words; everyday people also have their moments of wit and humor in their final moments. Here are some examples of funny famous last words from everyday people, along with the context that makes them so memorable.
1. “Damn, this is boring.” – Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
Context: Though a famous figure, Churchill’s last words before slipping into a coma were surprisingly mundane and humorous, reflecting his blunt and candid nature.
2. “I told you I was sick.” – Spike Milligan (1918-2002)
Context: Though a comedian, Spike Milligan’s epitaph humorously reflected a common sentiment of everyday people who feel their illness wasn’t taken seriously.
3. “I’ll be right back.” – H.G. Wells (1866-1946)
Context: The famous science fiction writer and satirist humorously assured those around him, leaving a lasting impression of his wit even in his final moments.
4. “I’m going to the bathroom to read.” – Elvis Presley (1935-1977)
Context: The legendary musician’s last words were casual and relatable, a reminder that even the King of Rock ‘n’ Roll had everyday moments.
5. “I’m going to be with Gloria now.” – Jimmy Durante (1893-1980)
Context: The famous entertainer, referring to his beloved wife who had passed away years earlier, left this touching and humorous farewell.
6. “I’m not afraid of dying. I just don’t want to be there when it happens.” – Woody Allen (1935- )
Context: Known for his neurotic humor, the filmmaker and comedian’s hypothetical last words perfectly capture his lifelong comedic style.
7. “Well, this is no way to live!” – Epitaph on a tombstone
Context: This tombstone inscription reflects a dark humor about the state of being dead, a witty remark from someone who perhaps saw the irony in the situation.
8. “I knew it. I knew it. Born in a hospital and died in a hospital.” – Comic strip character
Context: Though fictional, this epitaph humorously captures the full-circle irony of life and death.
9. “Hey, fellas! How about this for a headline for tomorrow’s paper? ‘French Fries.'” – James French (1936-1966)
Context: Convicted murderer James French made this darkly humorous pun on his name and method of execution (the electric chair) just before his death.
10. “I am just going outside and may be some time.” – Captain Lawrence Oates (1880-1912)
Context: Oates, a member of Scott’s ill-fated Antarctic expedition, stepped out into a blizzard to sacrifice himself for his companions, his understated and almost humorous resignation to his fate becoming legendary.
11. “Don’t worry, they’re not after you.” – Bank robber Willie Sutton (1901-1980)
Context: The infamous bank robber supposedly reassured a friend with these words before being arrested, reflecting his ironic sense of humor about his criminal life.
